Saturday, January 04, 2014

Feeling alone

Think I'm emo.. but just feel like no one cares or understands.

It's not that I want to rely on you.. it's just that I feel that's how a 'tag team' works. We support each other, isn't it? I'm perfectly fine looking after the kid on my own. Don't criticize the way I do things. You are not me. Just because you are comfortable leaving the kid on her own doesn't mean that I feel the same.

It's the same as how I never criticized the way you all treat a 12 yr old like she's 5. That's the one who should learn to be independent. Not my 2 yr old. If the 12 yr old can't take simple instructions and initiative, don't expect the 2 year old can. Stop the comparisons.

I treat you like the maid? Who's the one who gets to ride every weekend and who ends up looking after the kid(s)? You asked me to go for the mj session and I did. End up I need to take your sarcastic remarks? I don't need that. Thanks.

And I'm truly upset. So it makes perfect sense for me to not want to talk to you. If you think you are talking to a wall.. you made me into one. Only a wall will be able to withstand the unhappiness and not show it. Anyway even if the wall did, you'll be too insensitive to notice.

Feeling super frustrated. I'm going to bed.

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Woke up on the wrong side

Today's one of those days where I must have woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

Feeling irritated and simply frustrated. Not happy Mr A didn't fetch me to work although I do know it's not an obligation.. sigh.

Need to get out of grumpy mode! *振作!*

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

One of those days..

When you really feel like slapping someone.

Luckily my hero saved the day by bringing me shopping and allowing me to indulge in 4 pairs of shoes, which he paid for! :)

Such a lovely darling... *muackz*

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Just wondering..

Haven't been blogging for awhile...

I'm still where I am. No changes as things didn't work out as I hoped. Guess I'll just stick it out abit longer till I have the chance and choice to think about changes.

Mr A's on his cycling trip to Malaysia again. And I've just put naughty Phoebe to bed. Feeling tired out but not willing to sleep just yet as it seems to me my weekends are just zooming by too quickly.

To be honest, sometimes I do wonder if this is what I want. But at times when I see sweet Phoebe smiling at me and calling me mummy in her sweetest voice ever possible, I will not have a doubt that this is worth it. Just that there will be times when she's naughty or whiney, that I will wonder to myself why in the world did I choose such a life.

Sigh. Humans are really contradictory.

I really should be contented with what I have now and be happy. The rest will work out on its own.

:)

Sunday, June 02, 2013

It's june already?

Time's moving too damn fast.

Need.to.slow.down.

Major decisions got to be made soon.. to have or not to have? To change or not to change?

Sigh. Hate losing sleep thinking about such things. :/

Monday, January 21, 2013

Frustrated

Noticed I don't have any positive things to post these days. But sad to say, it's a fact that I have nothing happy to post these days.

How to when he starts comparing you with the ex?

How to when he starts saying you are all just the same.. demanding and demanding only?

Sian. My happiness level is really dropping.

Maybe it's really better to be gf/bf than married. I'm seriously not getting the happiness of being married.

Sunday, January 13, 2013

I don't care.

Communication is 2 way.

How to have a 2 way conversation when decisions are made one sided - leaving no room for discussions?

You can't blame me for keeping quiet if you've already made all the decisions ahead. What reaction do you want me to have when you already went ahead to buy a set of new wheels that cost a few k without discussing with me? On the other hand you have been telling me time and again how tight we are financially and how I shouldn't anyhow spend? Seriously what kind of reaction do you want me to give?

I'm tired. I hate feeling upset for not having respect shown. That's why I don't have any emotions anymore.

You can do whatever you want. I don't care and I don't want to care.

 

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